Friday, 26 February 2016

The outing in question....

So we all hop skip and jump with smiles on our faces into the car.... nope we really don't.

We scrabble out the door, amongst sighs and repeating 'get into the car, get into the car. OMG get in the car' we were on our way.

We arrive at the car park. After getting them across the road without anyone hurt (thats a win in my book). We go inside. Then its starts.....

Can we have pizza? Can we go on the bouncing castle? Why is that woman smoking? Oh look there is a platform Ill run to and jump for a laugh? Can we not just have a drink? Can we go bowling? Oh my god, what is that? We reach the entrance.

In we go. Me 'Do not run away! I have 4 of you alone. Do not run away'.

Then it starts..... Can we have something from the gift shop? Why? They have a pic n mix? Mummmmmmmmmyyyyyy why? A cafe, mum they have a cafe. Mummmmmyyyyy there is a cafe. 

We go to a quiet corner, where through gritted teeth, I hiss.....'you are getting nothing. Nothing!It is expensive to come here and you will enjoy it then we will leave. Be grateful. Now lets go upstairs and have not run away'

Then it starts.....I turn to check the baby.....I turn back. GONE! Everyone of them has run off. I think 'dont panic, its a small room, lots of activities....eventually I gather them up. The baby now wants out. I cant watch all of them. Its very warm'. Eventually I relent and say we will get a drink at the cafe. The excitement in their faces. I think we should have just gone to Tescos cafe. Would have been easier and cheaper.

We go to the lift. 3 groups walk past me into lifts. 3.....not 1....3. I breathe deeply. 'Its fine its only a lift'. The lift comes, I turn to herd them in (yes its like sheep). One is missing. How is one missing? The only lift I get and 1 is missing!! Ok, I found him. In the lift. Down to level 1. I have baby in arms, pushing buggy with a finger. Others are excited by a bottle of juice.

All out of lift. I check them all. I turn a one is screaming in agony in the corner of the lift. I cant understand whats happened. He is stuck. How is he stuck? Omg what do I do? I run back with baby. Other two (7 & 3) are outside said lift. An arm is stuck. How can an arm be stuck? How? I get him out with the mummy techinque (ie wiggle until I can manage to release him). I turn. Lift has left. Left my other two kids and a buggy alone. What seems like 4 hours however I am sure was 3 mins. We return. I cant cope. No one even helped. I am hormonal, upset, scared, angry and worn out. We leave. My poor child didnt even get sympathy for his sore arm until the car park.

The entire way home, my kids get lecture after lecture on behaviour etc. They listened for the first 45 seconds after that, I am white noise......

Friday, 19 February 2016

Preparing for an outing .....

So folks, you know when you get a rare day of a decent (of course by that I mean more than 4 hour uninterrupted), you haven't overindulged the night before and ready to live life.

Half term approached, I knew I had to entertain the kids for a few days and hubby was at work. I thought Ill take them out. Whats the worst that can happen....

I went through all the possibilities to visit.

1. The park...... no too cold for the kids even though they will refuse to wear a coat. Alex is attempting to get out of the buggy all the time as he thinks he is 2. I would freeze to the point of sore nipples and probably end up talking to people I have never met about stuff I never discuss.

2. The museum.... glass, stairs, old things, half term crowds and the dreaded gift shop (I swear if I visit place I should just head straight for the cafe or the gift shop....would end a LOT of arguments)

3. The beach/coast drive....4 kids, me and a small car space....NO!

4. Playcentres? Well I have an issue with them. I mean the stress me out. (seems most things do as I am realising while I write). You see, if we are there and my kids go to play three scenarios happen. Either my kids get hassle from other kid. You follow said kid for a while trying to determine mum/dad to then realise they are at the next table, in which you are having an argument with her in your head about her snotty kid then you annoy yourself before you leave. Then you are annoyed because you said nothing. My kid knocks, pushes or hogs something in which case, having not seen what had happened (although I do keep a good eye on my kids) you are stressing and telling them off while getting evils from the parent who is more than likely sitting at the table beside you. Or last but not least, I was just at the stage where my kids could play and I could sit. Obviously with my phone. Now however I am back to the stage, I have to take my shoes off and go into the baby play area. Now in there are normally two types of mums, first embracing playing with their child, acting, playing, chasing, swapping tips with other mums, maybe pregnant and totally ok with only their socks on (I dont like feet) or like me, mums who dont want to wish the young years away but really doesn't want to pay. Had 7 or more years of playcentres, who wants to keep her high heels on because she has a black and a navy sock on and finally just cant be bothered (which of course feels guilty about). then of course the dreaded cafe!!!! So no the playcentre was out....

5. The science one....I decided although expensive, they had something for all ages....Alex was in a buggy, there was plenty of sound and lights etc so that should keep him happy, they couldn't destroy much AND the cafe was out of sight....

So after a morning of arguing over everything from who got what from the tiny kelloggs packets (I ALWAYS make the mistake of thinking they are a good idea) to what the score on the wii was to how rubbish Messi was (who?) on match attacks cards.....we braved our visit to W5... TBC

I am back

Well after a very turbulent 2 years, I have decided to return to writing my blog. Its not so much for people to read it but to get all the information, thoughts and funny comments out of my head as I think it may explode with the amount circling.

Update since the last blog, another baby boy Alexander Harry Boyes. He has just turned 1 so of course in true mental mother style, I have went back to work with juggling 4 kids, work and a online course. Sure why would I not run myself into the ground.....more post to follow.....

Thank you all for reading!